online: 19 september 2011 modified: 18, 19 september 2011 18 september 2011 panorama
Parliament Hill
...a wider view of the city... perhaps because two or three separate rainstorms are visible from here... while the rest of the scene (though cloudy) is not being rained on...
...and now sunlight shining through a gap in the clouds illuminates one or two tall buildings in the financial district... while all the others are in mist...
...and now the rainstorms are moving away to the south and the whole scene is unified by difffuse sunlight filtered through a thin layer of clouds...
...on my way here from the north side of the heath i circled the tumulus... where four years ago some of us celebrated my birthday... as i thought again of that circle (as representing the decades since my birth) i realised that it is best to let go of those memories while i contemplate stepping forward into a new watershed or circumstance...in which attempted actions of the past can perhaps be replaced by a new continuity... (or something)...
...and that it's time to attempt something more connected than the incomplete actions i recall...
...as i struggled to find words for that intention the clouds thinned and retreated until the whole scene became clear in cool air and sunlight... and many tall buildings became lit against the retreating blue-grey clouds...
...people stand still here talking quietly and i feel content in their presence... as in that of the vast city... and the trees... and this hilltop... the scene of so much that has happened both inside and outside this diary...
...now the sunlight becomes stronger... and even warm on the west side of my face as i look south... and the whole city and the treetops and vanishing clouds and rainstorm are illuminated brightly in still air... while each spear or leaf of grass is lit up separately by low sunlight that is shining horizontally along the ground...
at the station:
...people smiling and even waving to each other across the tracks.... and now some of them vanish while others appear... by the magic of transportation...
...then my train arrives and i get in while still writing... i continue as we enter the tunnel below the heath... and arrive at the next stop... where i get out quickly and climb steps to a bus stop above the tunnel... where a bus arrives immediately... and i put the handheld into a pocket during the crush to get on... and to leave a hand free to swipe the digital ticketting pad...
...now inside the crowded bus i perch on half a seat (much of which is occupied by an extra-large person)... and now these thoughts are nearly forgotten in the squeeze to get out at my destination... (though i am writing this on the open handheld while hoping not to delete anything accidentally)...
hours later: i've edited this considerably as i tapped unintended keys and omitted thoughts in the crowded and hurried circumstance...
for instance the last paragraph was written on the bus as follows:
...now inside a crouded interior i find a half seat the rwst of which is occcupied by an extra large person... and now all these thougts are lost inthe minor hassle of depoaryv at next stop
...but... now that i can see the two versions together... i like the veracity of the original!
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